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Back Online

I took a very long break from blogging. I needed it. I think I was just getting seriously stale. But now I'm ready to participate again. It's time to rekindle my personal journey and reconnect.

Getting It Right...

That thought just passed through my head. When do we just "get it right." When do just feel content with ourselves and who we are? I took a mental health day off work today so I could just rest my mind. I've been doing so much thinking lately that I just need to be today. Sounds silly, but so necessary.

There will be more to come...finally.



Life Comes at you Fast

Wowsers! I feel like the last few months have been a little nutty. I always have had a tough time getting through January, but especially this year. Making a career change had finally caught up to me (financially and emotionally). I had expected to stick with the catering gig for six months and then hoped to have had something lined up. Not sure what that was, but something grand. I realized I was waiting for something to jump into my lap, the magic phone call or a "meant to be" moment. It either fell through or never happened.

Aside from the career woes, there have been a lot of other "distractions." The major one being the idea to start a family. However, it's not that easy for us (as for a lot of couples out there). My husband has a condition called CIDP (which is also another "distraction" we've been dealing with for quite a long time). We had decided that perhaps adoption was the best option given the craziness we'd have to go through to have a baby ourselves. But then there's this thing called money. And, wow, adoption is not affordable when you're practically living on one income. I had started to feel guilty for leaving my corporate job because I knew that money would not have been so much the issue if I had stayed. Of course, they do offer loans, but it just not something I want to "finance". So, we have decided to see what we can do, or better said, what the "special doctors" can do to help us have a child of our own. Oh, and then there's the health plan. Our's does not help much in this matter. It almost makes you wish you could qualify for a baby scholarship of some kind. I know that may sound insincere, but let me tell you how crazy your mind gets when your body wants you to get pregnant and the forces of nature are working against you.

I will be 33 this year and I have been putting enormous pressure on myself to meet some kind of deadline or plan. Part of the problem, too, is that I want it all. I want a new career, I want to have a child, I don't want to stress about money. I have to realize that things will happen when they happen. I have to learn patience with the universe...some serious patience.

Things are now finally looking up on the career side. I had decided to check out a career as a personal chef and signed up for the course last month through the APCA. I attended the weekend course last week and it was better than I expected. A great group of people, many in the same boat as me, ex-corporate people who are are following their passion for cooking and want to be their own boss. I highly recommend the course...but you have to enjoy cooking and being alone most of the time, which is not for everyone. But the nice thing is that you set your own schedule. So, then comes that "magic phone call", well, it was more like an email. A chance to cook a lot. I have been working these last few weeks on the plan to take over a kitchen for a small cafe. It will be challenging, but I feel like I need this experience. Fingers crossed that it works out and I do a good job. I can always fall back on the personal chef gig.

Thankfully we have a nice getaway coming up. My husband's company has an incentive for the sales force in which they will send you and your spouse to Hawaii if you are among the top three in sales numbers. He worked really hard and got it. We're headed to O'ahu and Kauai in April. These feet need to hit the pavement to get into serious shape before then. But it's certainly great motivation. I look at the calendar everyday to see how many days I have to exercise before we get on the plane.

I wanted to pass along a little advice about those who are changing careers or are thinking about it. It can be tough, tougher than you think, especially if you've worked hard your whole life and suddenly your not making as much money and your out of a routine. My biggest problem was my demishing self-worth (this goes to being extremely independent most of my life). But there's hope. I wish I had gone straight to the library or Barnes and Noble and parked myself there for several hours looking at books about making a career change. I started to lack confidence and I think it would (and still will help me) to see that other people have done this many, many times before me and they've managed to get to great successes. Also, it would have helped me realize what it was I really wanted. Again, it's not easy, especially if you feel you lack the credentials to go into a certain field. I picked up a book the other day at B and N called, "Life's a Bitch, and Then You Change Careers" by Andrea Kay. So far, I like the approach she offeres about changing careers. I would say check this book out if you're considering a giant leap from the great state of security.

I leave with this...

"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live."







I finally made it back here. Whew! It has been a while. I suppose the biggest reason for my absense is that I just got out of my daily routine. Life is quite a bit different since leaving a structured world. I also just lost the desire to blog about anything. I was kinda waiting to see how I felt in the new year. I wasn't sure if I'd retire or give it one more "season." I got a lot of comments from friends saying, "you don't blog anymore?...I use to read it everyday." This surprised me. I read some of my older posts and realized that I use to have fun with this thing. I am entering a new chapter in my life and I think I'll have a lot more to say this year. I am trying to start my own business (so scary and exciting) and also wanting to start a family (one way or another) - it has it's obstacles. I feel super refreshed, and so I thought it would be good to jump right back into it where I left off.

One of the big accomplishments of last year was making it through our big kitchen renovation last fall. Talk about throwing your routine out of whack! It finally got finished right before Thanksgiving. It's a very grown up kitchen with granite and stainless steele...ohhh...ahhhh! It is amazing that it is our's. There were a million and one choices to make and lots and lots of bargain hunting on the internet, but we managed not to beg, borrow and steal any more than we budgeted (okay, maybe a little). Damn, these things are expensive!

Here some more recent pics.



How do you like those crazy beams? We still have to find a stain we like. Sounds strange to say about a kitchen, but it's a very peaceful place for me. I can't wait to get home after being out on the town. This has only contributed to my serious "home body" issues.

This site is finally getting updated!



Where, Oh Where, Have You Been?

Gosh, it's been a while. I've missed this blog. It's already fall. It seems so sudden to me, although the weather has not changed much. We had our first day of rain in a long time. The colors of fall are certainly comforting. I had my first taste of pumpkin pie today. It wasn't has good as mom's, but I did eat the whole thing, so that must of been partially okay.

Life has been full of change these past few months. The kitchen is still being remodeled (it always takes longer than anticipated). I miss cooking. I miss a cup of tea at night before bed. I am saving all the new fall recipes (great ones in this month's Real Simple) so I can cook up a storm for Thanksgiving.

I've had a case of the career blues lately. I left the corporate world in April and went straight into catering and loved it. At first, I was super busy, but now it's just slowed down way too much and I am not bringing in enough money. I just don't know what direction to go in. I am going to start on my business plan next week. The country market (as some of you may recall back in April as well) came back to us and fell through a second time. A little more devistating than the first because we started to celebrate this time around and it was sold to another party. I know there is a major lesson in all of this. Maybe it was to prove whether we really wanted something in the first place. Ah well...on to a new path and new challenges.

My mom and I are headed to the Waterford Festival tomorrow. It will be a nice drive and a great getaway. I discovered the fair through Paige and Larry Koosed. I had ordered a cute watercolor from them last month and they said they would be showing at the fair.

Eric and I are headed back up to Connecticut this weekend to see our beautiful friends get married. I've got to remember my dancing shoes. These friends know how to party. We'll also get to see beautiful New England in all of its colorful fall glory.

Have a great weekend.



From The Road

About an hour and a half into our trip my husband looks over at me in the passenger's seat and says, "Want to surf the net?" And so here I am posting from I-95 North headed to New York. It's always amazing to me how many cars travel daily. It's survival of the fastest on this road.

As usual, we missed our departure time by two hours. The hazards of not setting an alarm clock. My husband is driving like Andretti to get me to Tinsel Trading Company on West 34th street by 5:30. Then it's off to Haru for our long awaited sushi dinner. We still haven't found anything in comparison down in Maryland, so this will be a big treat.

We are headed up to see some friends in Connecticut and New York and to celebrate with Amy at her baby shower on Sunday. I think it's always fun to come back to a familar place after a long time away. There are always things to discover that were an oversight in an everyday sense. I love the New England scenery. One thing I miss terribly are my buddies, so it will be great to see their beautiful faces.

I am sending big hugs to my parents this weekend. They just lost their sweet Molly suddenly to kidney failure. She was a gorgeous german shepherd so gentle and kind. She will be so missed by all of us. My Mack had a great affection for her. She was his little gal pal. Sending you both our love and support in such a difficult time.

A break from the house is greatly needed. It has ben quite a circus with multiple contractors visiting this week, but we are making progress...finally!

I will post some pictures upon our return. Have a fabulous weekend.



Crash, Boom, Bam!

The house projects continue...and continue...and continue. We spent Labor Day weekend ripping out the kitchen and dining room. It was actually fun the first three days and by the fourth I was just useless. Amazingly there were no injuries to report. Definately a few close calls.

Discovered a built in spice rack behind the walls and some darling daisy wall paper. I think I'd go insane if my kitchen was plastered with this stuff.

The floors got refinished. Very rustic looking, just the way we like it.

Our downstairs bathroom was quite a site. It had anchor wallpaper on the bottom and green stripes on the top with an ugly green tub to match, which we would only use to wash Elvis. It's on its way to a serious makeover. I'm excited about the mirror being made by Sanata Theresa Tileworks.

This turned out to be a disaster. I thought I could save the moldings around my office windows and give new life to the doors. Wrong! I failed at getting the 5th layer of paint off. It was a messy, messy job and now they just need to be totally replaced anyway...ah, ohwell, live and learn. But my office did get paitned a pretty color called tropicana cabana. It glows at night, seriously.

I can't wait to post the "after" pics. Soon, very soon! (I hope).


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